Is my hair grey enough?
That IS my natural hair colour. After two and a half years, the dye job has disappeared and my grey hair has grown in. Surprisingly, the natural colour is darker than expected with natural streaks of dirty blonde-y, brown-y hair. Who knew? My gorgeous silver-haired friend Hilary Roberston was over from New York recently and I joked that my hair was NOT grey enough. Anyhow. Uncovering my natural hair colour after being a bottle blonde from the age of 15 has made for quite an interesting experiment. Once I’d gone through the horrible badger stripe, roots/regrowth stage, that is. Fortunately, I have a Mallen Streak of white hair at the front (it’s been there for years) and this helped to deflect attention away from what was going on backstage. After years of blonde highlights I had no idea what my natural hair colour was going to be, but the mixture of warm and cool Scandi tones now revealed is infinitely preferable to the yellow dye job. RESULT: I like it.
At the end of last year, Pinterest predicted that in 2019 consumers would ‘stop fighting the natural ageing process in favour of letting their silver strands shine through’ (hello, Salma Hayek), this after searches on the social media site for the term ‘going grey’ went up 879%.
I was asked recently if I ever thought grey hair would hold me back at work. To be honest, this isn’t something I’d ever considered as I work in the fashion industry on a freelance basis, and the general reaction has been very positive. People admire my natural grey hair. But I do know that women who work in other industries feel under pressure to look a certain way; basically, to look young and that means having young/coloured hair. Ageism is rife in certain businesses – and keeping up appearances involves a lot of maintenance, including regular dye jobs (some women go to the hair salon every few weeks) and various tweakments, in order to stay forever young. Hopefully, the increased numbers of women showing their silver hair will change all this.
Part of the fear of going grey when you’re over-50, is that the change (of hair colour) will make you look older. I know I look my age and I’m happy with that. With age, comes self-acceptance and increased confidence. Admittedly, there are times when my hair is tied back and I catch my make-up-less-self in the mirror and get a bit of a shock. But I can always usher in the blusher. The reality of this grey-naissance is that I don’t feel older. I feel authentic. I feel better.
And, my hair IS grey enough. I wish I’d done this sooner.
Here are some products that are good for grey hair:
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Discussion (90 Comments)
Clara B says:
My hair was the softest, glowiest silver after chemo, but it’s grown darker and darker since then. I suppose it’s a sign of my returned health, but I would LOVE to get that colour back again.
Kath says:
As someone who started to go grey at 13, I can’t tell you how liberating it was a couple of years back, at the age of 44 to say “I’m over dying my hair”….
Fortunately I’ve had a pixie cut since my early 20s so I had it cut as short as I could handle (pretty much a buzz cut) and didn’t have to endure more than a couple of months of less than ideal hair… And I can tell you that I’ve never had more compliments about my hair than I do now that I’ve stopped altering it with chocolate brown dye. Anyone who is debating whether to take the plunge – don’t hold back!SFord says:
Thanks for the encouragement Kath. I have a shortish bob and have deliberately grown out a mallen streak at the front to see what my ‘natural’ colour is (white). Ive had lots of compliments and I love it. I am toying with the idea of a pixie cut and may couple this at the same time with stopping dyeing my hair too even though my hairdresser is not keen (‘It will make you look older’!)
Did you find you had to change your make up at all? I am pale skinned and am worried about looking like casper the ghost with pale skin and white hair!
I have stuck to the same makeup over the years – but I don’t wear a lot of it really. As an Australian, I get a fair bit of incidental sun even when I wear plenty of spf. But like you, I’m pale really. But a nice pop of brighter lipstick does wonders for when I feel less than glowing….
Elspeth says:
I agree 100%! I am now two & a half years dye free and so glad I did it. Went thru some old photos recently and was shocked at how rubbish some of my very expensive dye jobs looked. Occasionally I look a bit washed out, but I probably looked washed out with coloured hair too. Viva la grey (& lashings of red lippy)
Monty says:
Alyson, you and your hair, look fantastic! I’m a natural blonde going grey and I love how it looks. Am looking forward to being completely grey! I would like to think that attitudes towards grey hair has changed a lot. In my mother’s day, grey hair meant you were old with a capital O but that’s certainly not the case today. Grey is great 🙂
I decided to grow out my dyed hair when I turned 60. This was for a number of reasons, one of which was that I felt uncomfortable putting such strong chemicals on my scalp when I have a long list of chronic illnesses. In the end, I think that my natural colour suits me much better – a mix of greys from silver to charcoal. Now, when I look at photos from before, the dyed hair looks so harsh and flat. I joined a Facebook group for greying women and it seems as if this is the same for us all. Our “real” hair colour looks so much better. In fact most of us look younger and our eyes shine out brighter.
Your colour is gorgeous and suits you so well! ❤️
Cathy Blackwell says:
Anne I’m also in my 60’s and letting the gray have its way! Could you share the Facebook group you mentioned? I’d love to join
Anne says:
I highly recommend Trevor Sorbie’s Colour Silver Shampoo – it’s made my grey hair absolutely gorgeous and radiant. I’m moving abroad and just ordered a couple of bottles so I can survive for a while until I find a new brand.
Isobel says:
Your hair is really beautiful, Alyson and I love your whole look. Once, at the big op-shop where I volunteer, I overheard a customer refer to me as ‘the lady with grey hair’… for a split second I felt affronted – after all, the volunteers are mostly around my age and it was as if she was singling me out as the ‘old’ one! Then it instantly hit me that everyone else still colours and coifs, so of course I stand out! These days I feel so comfortable being the real, nearly 64 year old me and I’m quite proud of my naturally highlighted hair… but nobody has ever ADMIRED MINE!!
Sarah says:
You look amazing Alyson, the different tones in your hair look very cool.
As a very dark brunette (with a sprinkling of grey) I wish I could go the whole hog too, but my own dark hair has lost all tone, and I just can’t face the lack of colour. I think going grey is easier if you have lighter hair to begin with and/or quite a lot of grey. I have noticed a huge increase in women not dyeing their hair, and I love this movement. It’s so empowering seeing women making the statement, ‘this is me, and it’s enough’. As soon as I have enough grey hair I’m joining y’all.
Mrs Tonia says:
I was dark haired too. But following the example of Alyson about two years ago I’ve finally grown out all the dyed brown bits of my hair and very happy to have done so. It’s not white and may never be an all over silvery grey but that’s fine. Now people complement me on how nice my hair looks which never happened previously. The best thing about having natural uncoloured hair now is that the texture and manageability are hugely improved. I don’t use the special shampoo for grey hair. I don’t seem to need it. I’m sticking with a gentle French brand for coloured hair. Best conditioner out there is Living Proof, Perfect Hair Day. Leads to perfectly groomed hair with ease now.
The grow out process is hard. I never cut my hair shorter than a chin length bob but kept having the bottom trimmed every six to eight weeks. Really worth it in the end.
As Alyson says I look and feel my true age but it’s a feeling of authenticity. That’s fine too.
Donna Gilbert says:
Like you, I used to colour my hair but when I grew it out I found it was almost completely white and I’ve embraced it. I use a brilliant shampoo from Osmo called Super Silver shampoo which leaves a subtle purple tint. To be honest, I’ve never had so many compliments about my hair – people of all ages stop me in the street to talk to me about it which, given that I’m 56, is so weird! I don’t think I’ll ever go back to dyeing or highlighting my hair. My silver hair might make me look older but it’s my signature style now.
Jill says:
Welcome to the Silver Foxes! You look stunning. I did this 9 years ago and I have never looked back……
Lesley Somerville says:
Couldn’t agree more. I too look my age (63) and used to think that people my age with dyed hair look younger. And in some ways they do; at first glance when you see blonde/brown/red/ or whatever hair, you expect the face to look a certain way, a younger way than a person with grey hair. But then when you see the face, the hair doesn’t match. The face can look older when juxtaposed with ‘younger’ hair; the skin tone can look drained by the harshness of the dyed colour. So that initial impression is soon replaced by the idea that this is a older person trying to look young.
Like you, I’m now happy to look and be my age. It’s a good age, I’m happy, confident and fulfilled. More visibly grey haired women will encourage others I’m sure. We are learning to truly be who WE want to be. Hooray!Kirsty says:
Great Post – I’ve found there’s lots of advice on growing out your grey, but very little on living with the new colour.
My hair was a lot lighter than I thought it would be. It’s white, and not the silver I thought I’d have.
Funny how we all have an idea of what the ‘perfect’ grey would be.
Fiona Slade says:
I too stopped colouring my hair back in 2016. I’m so glad I did it, my hair is in better condition now and the colour suits me – of course it does, it’s the way it’s meant to be!
I know what you mean about catching a glimpse of yourself in a reflection. I sometimes forget I’m grey! I’m still not into wearing bright lipstick as I’ve always been a nude girl, but getting a makeover soon at Look Fabulous Forever in Wimbledon, so I’ll see what they say!
caroline says:
Hi Alyson, your hair looks lovely with its variety of hues mixed together. It is so much more natural and beautiful than any dye job would give you. And as far as hair colour goes, IMO, the most natural look is generally best!
Patrish says:
Your hair looks lovely. The color suits you. Live along into it and in the next 20 years or so it will be grey enough!
I had the same feeling when I was in my early 50’s….now, I’m totally white.
Keep the cut modern and tweak your makeup along the way. That’s the trick.
Bravo to you.Janice says:
Grey hair is gorgeous and glamorous. I stopped dying 3 years ago and wouldn’t change a thing. I do appreciate that ageism is real but we should get out there and tackle that nonsense.
Alyson – your hair is a work of art!Darlene Monis says:
Thank you for the article. I am 64 & went natural this year. Wow what reactions I got! Several women recoiled & had comments like “oh my gosh your going to color that ?!” I could never do that they would say. Interesting enough my male coworkers & customers ( I manage a country nut store out on a farm) complimented me..like the hair..looks good ..& we don’t talk about how I look..lol I am not looking for attention. Now I’m getting double takes..are people trying to figure out my age because of the platinum hair lol?
Alyson McGarrigle says:
I think you are very brave and it looks good. I have just turned 59 and am still dyeing my hair it’s original dark colour, can’t quite bring myself to give in yet……maybe next year. I think I would need to improve my make up skills first
Kerstin says:
<3 I lover your outfit and, of course, your hair! Well done!!! At least the outfit will be copied by me!
Greetings from Germany,
KerstinNina says:
Your natural color is so lovely!! I love the white-dark transition. It’s really striking! I’ve been having a difficult time transitioning as well, and have been so inspired by you! Thank you!
I just finished growing out my colored hAir as well and I’m liking the results. I too was surprised at the ultimate result. My mother had beautiful white hair, but mine is steel gray, at least at the moment. I get ton of compliments on the color and the cut – I have a marvelous hairdresser.
We’re on vacay in the Caymans and I’ve been marvelously surprised at how easy it is to keep up. – just wash and go!
I’m glad thT there’s an authentic movement afoot & I home more of us of a certain age will follow suit!fabhat says:
It looks fab Alyson! I’ve just starting to get my first grey hairs after having a few years of my hair getting darker (naturally) so those white springs are beginning to stand out – and I don’t mind. I feel lucky that I have role models of my mother who sports a sleek silver bob at 79 and also her mother who wore her snow white hair in a pixie cut into her 80’s – who knows what I will end up with!
I love your grey hair. Particularly that Mallen Streak. And I love that you said Mallen Streak. Alluding to Catherine Cookson, is that your northern roots showing through?
Keren Carter says:
Grey hair is a badge of honour – we’ve worked hard to earn it! But oldsters like me (72) often have the problem of hair post-menopause that has thinned or become baby-fine. Or in my case, both though you seem lucky enough to have avoided that problem. Solution – a grey wig in whatever style you feel like on any particular day. Saves so much time, rather than trying to make something out of nothing in my case, saves tons of money too and always looks good. Recommend.
Joyce Morris says:
I’m probably unusual in that I wish mine would GO. I’m seventy and I’ve had a Mallen Streak for years now, but the rest of it remains stubbornly brownish, with the odd suggestion of, cobwebby, grey.I had assumed it would be silver by now and was quite looking forward to it.
The other thing I would point out is that our skin tone never works, in my humble, with dyed hair, as we age and we are ,therefore , in danger of looking harsh.
Yes, embrace the grey and enjoy.Jodi Brown says:
Your hair sounds very similar to mine Joyce. I had hoped to be all grey by 55 but Mother Nature isn’t playing ball.
Goddessinthedetails says:
Me, too. I have what my hairdresser calls ‘a few sprinkles.’ The rest of my hair is so dark brown as to be almost black (I’m Eurasian) and as I’ve got older my natural colour looks too harsh. So I have to dye my hair not to cover the sprinkles but to avoid looking washed out. I’d rather like to be grey enough to stop.
Karen Rennie says:
great locks, well done! I have never dyed my hair, and am now 62, so certainly no intention to start now.
I have found Elnett flexible hairspray ( not perfumed which is great!)
together with GHD hair straighteners have done the trick – smooth and silky finish to thick coarse hair everytime.Lizzie says:
Love the tones – looks really great. I find the biggest shift is the hair texture so my once ringlet curly hair is now corser. So I went for a radical crop and in doing so decided to embrace my natural colour – I’m phasing into it with a few streaks to even out the tabby cat look (the sides of my head went grey first) but I feel it’s the way to go. The key thing is to find a sympathetic hairdresser who cares about you first rather than clocking up some expensive hair dye time with you.
Linda B Kerr says:
I was waiting for someone to post something about this type of texture change. Me too! I have been seeing more and more coarse, wiry strands. My hair’s always been curly/frizzy, but these are a different animal all together. I pull them out when I see them.
Rebecca says:
I have long hair and finally got on top of the coarse texture by ditching shampoo (‘no poo’) and using conditioner instead – (‘co-washing’), followed by a homemade leave in conditioner and NO BLOW DRYING. I spend what I save on hair products on expensive perfume and makeup 🙂
Non sulphate or nopoo definitely the way to go – I follow ‘The Curly Girl’ bible but realise to keep older curly locks in top condition needs a lot of maintenance. I would love to have the great Carole King’s mop for instance – but sadly I don’t have her string of fabulous hits to roll the curls!
Toomanyshoes says:
You look great as always! This article does though raise the tiring assumption that if you dye your hair once you are what 30.? 40.? Certainly 50 you are trying to look young/ “fighting the ageing process”. I dye my hair because I like it better that way. I get my nails done for the same reason. As for “tweaks” – these days it seems to be about looking fresher rather than younger. Men as well as women. Each to their own. If dyeing your hair makes you feel inauthentic ,or you can’t be bothered with it then fine, don’t do it. But it irks me that the tone of conversation around this issue can too easily slip into smug moral superiority. I work in a very corporate field and grey hair is not an issue at all. Looking put together and projecting personality in a professional way though is. Scruffy hair is scruffy whether dyed or not.
I agree Toomanyshoes, each to their own. There are many women who look fabulous with dyed hair – Grace Coddington, for one. And women like Christine Lagarde who look super-chic with silver hair. As I mention, I was surprised to be asked the question about work, as I hadn’t considered it an issue (for me) – but I know from the comments I receive on That’s Not My Age and from talking to hairdressers that ageism is one of the reasons some women continue to dye their hair. Having said that, I think we are the generation who are shaking things up and doing our own thing. Hoorah!
Anna A says:
You look rock chick edgy! I’m salt and pepper and started with a white front streak in my late 30s which I love. In fact people ask me if it is a dye job.
Jill says:
Thank you Alyson, the last few sentences could have been written just for me! I stopped colouring last year in a bid to have a more honest, mindful, less cluttered life (never mind the annual costs!) Suprisingly little grey, a mix of blondes and browns, my husband says it suits me better., (he is a definite keeper).
My hairdresser asked me how I felt about it at my last cut and my reply was similar to yours, I feel my honest, more me.. And yes, why didn’t I do this years ago.
The one thing I’m not totally happy with is the texture, do you all find it’s thinner as bleach swells the hair shaft? What do you use to help create a fuller look?Hi Jill, yes that’s a good point, my hair does feel thinner – I’ll do a follow-up post about this.
Vicki says:
A texture post would be great! I have (had?) fine stick straight hair that I colored as much for volume as for color. Now I’m getting coarse wavy grey hairs mixed in that break easily and stick out. I look like I have a halo. Then, I was put on thyroid meds which thinned it all. My hair products make our political parties look unified!
D says:
Gorgeous! I love it. A woman I work with has the exact type of colors that you have going on as you with the gray coming in – and she has long, straight hair all the way down her back and it is just gorgeous. She is a pharmaceutical executive and she always looks so polished and professional – she is really stunning. I am not ready to do it yet, but articles like yours (and seeing the Salma Hayek post – thanks for the link) is wonderful. I have coloring more like Salma so it was nice to see that photos. Cheers!
I’ve had “I Love Lucy” bright red hair for 40 years, since I was 35. You do the math. It felt right then and still does today. I’m not trying to fool anyone into thinking I’m younger. Red hair is a deliberate part of my look, and I hope to keep it that way as long as I can and have hair. That being said, I LOVE a woman with beautifully groomed and styled grey hair. Silver or white is even better. I’m even a bit envious. I know my own grey would be “old dishwater” (have had enough hints). The most important thing is to be comfortable with who you are!
Exactly! And I know – because I’ve seen it with my own eyes – that your ‘I Love Lucy’ hair looks fantastic, Michelle.
Anna J says:
Hi Alyson, moving from what Jill says above, I too have very fine thin hair and am too scared to stop highlighting it as it gives my hair body. Will look forward to your follow up post.
Love reading all of your posts, always lots of good info and observations!Jackie C says:
Great posts today! This is so timely as I’ve been toying with the idea of not going for my 1/2 head colour at the end of the month. I got my longish hair cut up short just before Christmas and despite my fears I’m so glad now I did. But like Jill and Anna J my hair is thin particularly at the front and worried that more scalp will be noticeable. So I look forward to your post Alyson. You do look great and love how you pulled the outfit together. Can I ask what label the jeans and jacket are?
Sara says:
Apart from the great colour, Alyson, you have really really good hair! It looks fab. I think I am with Toomanyshoes and Michelle B as I am reluctant to let my (dyed) reddish hair go. It is emphatically NOT about trying to be younger, I’m quite happy with whom I am at 68 but it is part of my overall look; it will be a nightmare to change and my hair is disobedient. Colouring it is a doddle so it does not take up masses of time, money or effort but maintaining a halfway decent style does take a bit of time and I am pretty sure it will be greigy (is that a new word?) and mousy, not top of anyone’s list of attractions. If I had the glorious silver natural shade of one of my good friends, I’d go with it , but I am 95% sure that will not be me.
All power to those who chose their natural colour but the same to those who like their chemically enhanced locks too. The great advantage of older age is doing one’s own thing and feeling good whatever it may beAcacia Maduro Hagen says:
Hi! I feel that letting my hair go gray I’m not in the role model for Brazilian middle class women… It’s not exactly an obligation to be young, but to be “groomed”, to “make an effort” to be “presentable”. I’m very happy with my hair, still dark but with a big white streak in the front.
So grey hair is seen as ‘not making an effort’? I’m curious. And is it the same in other countries/cultures? I’m not sure, so it’s a genuine question. What do people think? I guess the phrase ‘letting yourself go’ is the other way of implying you’ve given up – being attractive? Sexy? Worthy of attention? Seems hair can be more than just the stuff on your head. And don’t get me started on hair in other places!!
I really like how you express this. I think it’s why the idea of growing one’s dye out is frightening. All one has to do is keep hair well cut and wear makeup and dress well so one doesn’t look like one is past caring about appearance. I think this is more in the mind about self-image than real from my experience. Though initially I had to explain what I was trying to achieve so I wasn’t perceived as not bothering.
Rochelle says:
Once brown, my hair is now salt-and-pepper with rather dramatic silver streaks at front. When I first went through the menopause, my hair thinned rather alarmingly. This gradually stopped in my 60s and my hair took on more body so if this is happening to you, don’t dispair. As for changing makeup, yes, that’s important. Although counter-intuitive, wearing less, not more, is the trick for looking fresh (a good blush does wonders). Also, take a stern look at your wardrobe. Now in my early 70s, bright colors no longer work for me, nor do many browns, pastels or….sob…camel. Black was my default color for several years, now it’s a rich grey to match my hair. Fun!
Jaxx says:
Alison, your hair looks great and it suits you and your look. There’s plenty of time left to go naturally 100% grey! I’m 56 and have toyed with letting the grey show. But, while I’m happy looking my age, I don’t want to look washed out, nor older (I work in the media and have not encountered ageism but don’t think going grey would help). I’m very pale, and my grey is very light. If I had olive/darker skin, and the right face shape and features for a pixie cut, I’d probably go grey now. As it is, I’m currently going a lighter red – more auburn/strawberry blonde – as I think that will be a transition I’ll be happy with for a few years. I do like being red as it’s my natural colour, it’s just the upkeep and the cost!
CeCe says:
I was a brunette and colored for 10+ years…”golden brown, lt. brown to dark brown”. I stopped when I became a grandma 3 yrs ago (52yrs young). And it’s wonderful not having to worry and schedule the time to color around holidays & occasions! Plus, my hair grows so fast that it was “skunking” every 4-5 weeks. I was also worrying about extra chemicals. I love my light to dark gray shoulder length hair & I’m really glad I do not color anymore! Very liberating!!
Elizabeth Hamilton says:
Hi, I’m a natural blonde who has been “restoring” my color with highlights for years. I’m 62 and no grey–my natural color is now a very mousy, ditchwater blonde and I can’t forsake the color yet. I did cut my blunt bob into a long on top pixie recently and it looks much fresher and I don’t mind the darker color as much. Definitely all a challenge to find a good make up balance, too. I think everyone should do whatever makes them feel confident and attractive!
maudie says:
Yaaay to the grey, Alyson. It looks fantastic – ‘spesh with the Mallen streak! I gave up the helmet head of dark (nearly black) brunette about two years’ ago (that kept fading to a grotty orange) and now have mid brown hair with silver sprinkles all over and two white streaks at the sides. It is softer against my wrinkly face and I can now wear greys and blues that I could not before. I thought my hair would be sophisticated grey all over – but no – but I am more than happy with what I have got and freedom from the tyranny of dyes, dry, split hair and ruined bathroom tiles. Apropros nothing – where did you get that fab ring from?
I love it, too. I’ve been going through the same process for nearly three years now, complicated by a hair dresser who used gentle, but unusual toners that resulted in slightly blue, lavender, or pink highlights. The lavender sent me over the edge, and I stopped going. A regular trim every now and then has worked. As you said, an interesting color has emerged–a rich, honeyed done that makes the grey interesting.
Simone Silverman says:
Your hair looks great and incredibly flattering on your skin. Silver-Grey-Gray is just another shade to choose from. X
Hello Alison! The title of your post, yet again, made me say, “Exactly!” I’ve recently been pondering if my hair was grey, (or as I prefer to say silver) enough. It is very similar to yours, white streaks at the front, much darker than I expected within my blonde, brownish streaks. As far as being labelled older with my silver hair, it’s true. I am an actor, mostly of stage, and I’ve had people flat out tell me that I don’t look my age on my face but that I do look older since I no longer colour my hair. Does that bother me? Not gonna lie, it does a bit. Has it held me back from being cast a few times? Most likely. Will I go back to colouring my hair? Absolutely not. There is such a freedom to embrace from owning my aging. Most days I love it. Of course, I sometimes wonder if I’d look better if it was a beautiful silver white all over, hence the pondering if my hair is grey/silver enough. Reading your post and all of the comments is inspiring. We’ve earned the right to age as we wish to, with or without adding colour to our hair.
Alysen Beacon says:
I don’t want to be Cassandra, but to what extent are we running the demographic bulge effect? All of us are boomers (63 for disclosure) and we are confident, well educated, and very vocal as a cohort. I love that our generation is re-writing what it means to age gracefully, and demanding that fashion houses and style and beauty counters consider ageing without the subtext that beautiful means without lines or saggy bits. I would be very very sad if I thought that fashion was inhibited by the need to cater to people with money to throw at age refusal. As a generation, we are worth cultivating for what we spend. We have earned a lot; our properties have probably earned more than we have. Well, mine probably has. But I still love what’s new, and interesting, even when I am not going to adopt 1% of it. I like to see it.
Apropos of very little, I have two “nieces” currently trying to make their way in the (London) fashion business. Both have near couture-level sewing skills. One looks fairly classic and is working at a successful mid-market brand; the other is channelling 80s punk, but with high level (savile row) tailoring skills. One is gradually forming a career; the other is struggling to get a foot on the ladder. How does one advise? It’s all about aesthetics, because most women want to look their best rather than edgy. Or contradict me.
Christian P. says:
You look divine, Alyson. And thanks in large part to your work, so do I. At 46, you’ve inspired me to embrace my increasingly greying hair. Your profiles of Alys Fowler and Nicola de Burlet convinced me to go short when I lost an alarming amount of hair from a bout of anesthesia-induced alopecia following surgery. (Thankfully it is growing back – silver!) Ditching the long hair makes me look and feel better. You’ve also encouraged me to embrace my inner gentlewoman. I was briefly concerned that tailored clothes and short, greying hair would diminish my femininity. Instead I’ve found it to be an incredibly punk expression of feminism. Thank you for showing me that above all, style is what makes you feel authentic.
It’s wonderful that our cohort are finding our own path to graceful ageing. Even better that we are not all taking the same path to stylish silvering. But because we are a huge generation, and currently have the economic advantage in our favour, are we tilting the market too much?
Alyson, You and two other women were my inspiration for stopping the dye and highlights 16 months ago. It’s almost all natural now, and looks similar to yours in color. I thought I’d be all silver, but I do have that beautiful silver streak in the front like you. As for texture, like most women my hair got thinner as I went through menopause. Then my hair was more “fragile” and the highlighting etc. didn’t “swell” my hair as it once did, and my hair was breaking and feeling not exactly like hair. Well, 16 months later and I’m happy to report that my hair looks and feels twice as thick and is so healthy – no more brushes loaded with hair falling out. I do take a biotin supplement as well. I love the way it looks, and the freedom and financial savings is fantastic. Again, thank you for being such a great inspiration – you really were the first one that got me going!
Step says:
I’ve been letting the white in my hair grow through for about 18 months, after reading the section about grey hair in your first book, but retained few dark streaks at the suggestion of my hairdresser. I love my Mallen Streaked fringe and the strands that show when I tuck my hair behind my ears. I think completely white hair would make me disappear, but I don’t worry about my roots any more as they are now white. At some point I’ll let it be completely natural, but not yet. I now find that I can wear grey and charcoal but no longer wear brown.
You look fabulous! I think that grey (silver) hair makes one look more natural with overall health. As one gets older, and continues to color their hair, the off balance of color between face and hair requires more makeup. Life can become easier with age (and less expensive) if we let it.
Thanks for the hair update!
DulcyTiffany says:
I think it’s five years since I grew mine out and people actually ask me where I get it coloured! It’s still not the norm where I work, but I like it and that’s all that matters.
The same thing happens to me. I have had hairdressers asking how the stylist managed to get the colour “so perfect”
Baby-soft, fine greying hair, with natural white highlights, make-up free peachy skin, with plenty of laughter lines, hairy armpits but smooth legs (when and where did the hair go??), only wear what pleases me, and nobody to ‘have to’ cook and clean for, other than myself… I can handle all the aches and pains that have come with ageing because of this glorious freedom! I feel very lucky!!
I think you are so brave going grey. I have not reached the point were I am quite ready to let my colour grow out. I am sure there will be lots of grey there but have no idea what my natural colour would be. Love – Jill stylishatsixty x
You look fabulous!
I was 57 when I started the process, got impatient, cut it all off and now, at 65, it’s still a mix of my dark chocolate brown with streaks of glorious silver – nature’s highlights are the best AND the most flattering to mature skin.Wanda says:
Alyson, your hair looks fantastic!
Highlights in perfect tones to compliment your skin,. And the low maintenance results in less
damage to your hair! Bravo!Trisha says:
I too love your hair colour. I have only dyed my hair 3 times – I had it dyed professionally – when I was in my 40’s.
I am now my mid 60’s . One of my sticking points was noticing that the colours that had suited me when I was younger did not suit me any more. I imagine that if you go grey ‘ quickly’ that is even more true.
I used to be a ‘Bright Spring’ and realised in my 50’s that those colours – which I loved – were too stark for me. I got my colours done again and I now look best ‘Cool Summer’ colours. That was transforming for me – and I also changed to a red lipstick which seems to brighten up my face now.
As a veteran of the grey-hair look, that is my biggest piece of advice for those who suddenly stop dyeing their hair – rethink your wardrobe and makeup colours – or you are likely to think grey hair doesn’t suit you and return to dyeing.I saw this post some days ago but only just getting my act together to comment!
I wonder if you remember that I used to argue with you about going grey because no-one was going to tell me what to do! And I continued to dye it (I realise now) quite a yellow colour. But two years ago I stopped the dye and I’m now quite white – and it looks and feels great to have done this! You look great with your hair au naturel! It’s so much better to be this way AND it looks good! Btw, I still wear warm colours as my freckles are still there under my skin so yellow remains my fave colour. But I also wear some cool clothes – the whole experience of being actually whiter is better!
I am 64 and let my hair go gray over 8 years ago. I have never looked back but I do feel you have to up your style and make up a bit to pull it off. I did a post in 2015 about going gray and it continues to still make the rounds. There was no information or much product back then. Thankfully, due to people like you, it is getting better. I have been using gray products for over eight years and I do know what works by now. Thank you for this post.
[…] the same time – and feel the same way – that grey is good. Here’s a post about her grey hair. Actually I love the colour my hair is […]
Well said Alyson – you own your grey and it is beautiful. That’s the thing about grey hair – we are all unique – no two heads are the same! Isn’t that a wonderful thing?!
Grey is OK!
Yasmeen Patel says:
I went grey at 35 and I’m always amazed at people’s comments both good and bad
rebecca says:
I found this a very interesting read. As we have now been in lockdown for 13 weeks or so in the UK my grey roots have grown out. I am soo ready to embrace the grey. There is only an inch of roots showing but it’s a start. Appointment at the hairdressers for a cut and no colour in a week. Happy days – bring on the grey.
Chris 
Sally 
Candice from Canada 
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I’ve just been through the same discovery as you. I’d been blonde as a child and started bleaching my hair in my mid-teens so, by the time I was in my ’50s, I had no idea what my natural colour was. Roll on a few years and as I realised that a lot of the ‘blonde’ was actually a creamy-white coming through, my hair stylist started matching the regrowth to that shade. Consequently, my going greyer was not a problem. HOWEVER, I underwent chemotherapy a year ago resulting in my hair thinning and, in the last couple of months have found that the regrowth – and the existing hair – has gone darker! A friend even asked if I was having low lights put in. So, although I still feel like a blonde, I’m now not. It feels odd after all these years.