How to wear colour with grey hair
Denim and mustard
One question I am often asked is ‘Does grey hair mean I need to change the colours I wear?’ While I spent years as a fashion editor dressing women (celebrities, models and readers) in colourful dresses and brilliant blouses because they ‘look better on the page’, there’s a difference between ‘ as seen on screen’ and appearance In Real Life. Style is personal and it’s all about finding the clothes and colours that suit your body shape, complexion and lifestyle. As part of a short Instagram project I worked on in 2019, I chose an egg yolk yellow trouser suit. The two-piece was lovely and received a great response but deep down I knew that head-to-toe Crayola brights were not for me. Both hair colour and complexion change as we get older, but this doesn’t mean dressing like a 1980s newsreader. Unless of course, you want to go bold (and a bit retro). It means dressing to feel our best, which may simply involve a small refresh, rather than a technicolored revamp. Whatever works for you.
Practising with pink
My skin tone can now be described as ‘cool with a generous sprinkling of sun damage’; my hair is its natural shade of gronde (grey and dirty blonde). And though I haven’t gone full Céline Dion, I have become a tad more adventurous with colour. This has been a natural progression rather than an intentional move. Clothes that I’ve been drawn to, include: the pink corduroy jacket, the burnt orange leopard print fleece, and the mustard yellow mac (a generous gift from Toast). Opening the closet doors still reveals a sea of blues and greens and charcoal greys, these are my colours, the tones that keep me in my comfort zone. Blending the new brighter shades in with navy, khaki and denim, makes the transition easier and less alarming to a colour shy minimalist, like myself. I much prefer dialling it down to standing out.
Dialling it down
When it comes to what to wear, I’ve always found rules and regulations restrictive. Every colour comes in many different hues, so there’s something to suit everyone – and what better time to experiment? Take ownership of your wardrobe and really figure out what works for you and the life you lead. Trying on clothes, or holding a garment up to your face, is the best way to do this. Check out which shade is most complimentary by standing in front of a mirror and asking yourself: ‘Does this look good?’ ‘ Does it brighten the complexion and give me a gorgeous glow?’ ‘Or does it make me look (and feel) like Edvard Munch’s The Scream?’ Any garments that receive an affirmative response to the final question – I’ve found I can no longer wear very pale grey, certain slightly dirtier shades of light blue and off-white – go straight to the top of the charity pile. They are not welcome in your wardrobe.
If faced with a rail full of greys and blacks, don’t be afraid to try something new. Right now that means buying online during lockdown – though this may sound a bit daft, I tried holding the underside of my wrist up to the screen next to the item of clothing and it works as a very rough guide to what suits (toffee-coloured sweater: yes, please. Sunshine yellow shirtdress: oh no). As with Liberating Your Partywear, wearing the right colour can spark joy. And who doesn’t need an extra dose of delight, right now?
Style Notes: The jumpsuit is from LF Markey and has been receiving a lot of love during lockdown. Hi-tops are Good News. Mustard yellow mac is from Toast.
Pre-pandemic photos by Claire Pepper.
Please note affiliate links in this post may generate a small commission
Discussion (32 Comments)
Thanks Mrs Tonia. I find that I have to be in the right mood to wear the yellow coat, rather than the other way around. Funny, eh?
Nancy says:
Thank you so much for the intel. So timely as I have been facing the same challenges and really haven’t seen any honest guidance.
I have following for quite some time now and really “listen” closely to all your postings. Thank you for all the thought, effort and work that goes into each post.Regards,
Nancy
I’ve recently stopped coloring my hair and still have a few bits of dye on the ends. It’s mainly silver, so I’m going to start adding more blue-based colors to my wardrobe while my eyes are adjusting to the change. (Those colors look better against my skin, anyway, although I’m drawn to mustards, like your jacket, and olive greens.). There is a bit of a learning curve, I think.
Like youI have just stopped colouring my hair which has now gone to a lovely bluey grey, I was always a warm colouring so have now find I need to rethink some colours I also liked mustards and olives, but also wore bright colours in my warm palette, now I am looking towards pinks, and blue based colours.
Sarah C says:
Sounds like we’re all at it! I’ve just chopped my hair down to about two inches and have less than one inch of colour left. I can’t tell yet though quite what colour I am naturally- it’s different in various places, some silvery white, some much darker. I’m still in the dark as to which colours might suit me in the near future.
Deborah Richards says:
Hi Alyson, yet another post that helped secure my confidence in the new ‘gwilver’ (grey, white and silver) hair of this former blonde mouse. I lost a lot of weight last autumn after a pre-diabetes scare and have spent the day trying on my ‘summer’ clothes this blue/yellow colour mix is truly wonderful and seeing you in it made me feel quite wonderful. I’ve spent the day altering what can be altered and putting the rest into the charity pile. Now proceeding to make a few additional items and looking at the ‘style’ elements of elasticated trouser hems, not sure I can wear this but might try. Thanks so much for your confidence enhancing posts.
Miss Nell says:
I’m 6 months into allowing my hair colour to grow out as it will. I haven’t thought too deeply about whether my colour choices in clothes will change but I am much more aware of earring and hat colours and how they look against the emerging grey/silver. I imagine it’s just a matter of time before scarves, tops and then the whole ensemble gets critical consideration. I’ll be interested to see if much changes and if my husband, who is very observant about my clothes and combos (in the nicest possible way), makes any comments. Thanks Alyson for TNMA. I often return to your posts over a cuppa and ‘flick’ through them for tips and readers’ comments.
Helena says:
I was about to get all indignant thinking “who’s telling me what colors I can and cannot wear now that my hair is turning gray,” because I believe you should wear what brings you joy and to he** with people who say this color clashes with that hair or at this age I should act it…. but then I actually read your piece and you said, “Whatever works for you,” and so I was happy. Every once in a while someone will say “I look horrible in x color,” and in my mind’s eye I hold up a big fat sweater of that color against the person’s face, and … I can’t remember a single time when I thought “OMG you’re right, that’s terrible.” Seriously, I have yet to see someone “wash out” because of a piece of clothing. If you feel pale, dab on some lipstick or blush. If you feel red, be happy you’re not feeling pale. If you feel too colorful, be happy that you have colorful clothes to choose from. I think so many women stuck in “I only look good in blue” ruts and “nothing matches orange hair” outdatedness and I just want to scream, “LET GO, WOMEN FRIENDS, rock your fabulous selves and wear for your mood, not for your supposed color or lack thereof!” It’s all about the attitude and the joy and the swagger. You be you and to heck with all the color rules.
Agree with you about outdated rules and wearing what makes you happy, Helena. And I can’t believe someone would say ‘You look horrible in that colour.’ I made my own decision about pale greys and creams – which I hardly ever wore anyway, come to think of it.
Christina says:
This is so true, and nice to hear. I’m tired of reading comments on style websites from women obsessed with their ‘season’ colours, as if they can’t wear what they really like!
It’s an interesting experiment, I find. Mostly I avoid brown, which I love, but a shade of tan brown works well with my grey hair. Bright colours don’t do much for my face and red lipstick makes me look as though I have been laid out for viewers in the mortuary. Softer, I think, is the way I have to go. Blue is good in any form, which is fine by me.
lizzie g says:
i’m with you on pale grey, off white and some pale blues. but the charity pile isnt the only option for shirts and T’s or even dresses, especially if they fit well and will be missed. so long as they are cotton or viscose, i dye them to richer blues, greens or burgundy for a new lease of life, indigo works particularly well. maybe i’ll try mustard or marigold next time. just watch out for the visible/ top stitching which may remain the original colour or embrace it as a utility style feature.
Julia says:
Yes indeed. I have always been a big fan of dyeing but too many times have fallen foul of polyester stitching on cotton or linen readymades! I do sew my own clothes so these days more often than not dye the fabric when I can’t find just what I want.
i’ve had plenty of successes where stitching is only in a seam or hem and not visible, or where visible stitching also dyes well. Going from white or pale grey to a warm pink or primrose yellow, it doesnt matter if the stitching doesnt dye too, its only noticeable on darker colours.
i also dye garments that have faded or have minor stains, (collars,…) from wear and tear, they gain a new lease of life and i get new clothes.
Lynn Loring says:
People can wear any color…it’s the shade and intensity that determines what looks good on someone.
I look great in blood red, which has an underlying blue tone. I turn yellow if wearing a red orange.
I learned his long ago when “Color me Beautiful” came out
Linda says:
This post really hit the nail on the head. Over the past year I have transitioned from a dark brown to white! Never thought my natural hair colour would be white. So now I’m having to re-think colour – my wardrobe was full of green, orange and mustard. And now for the first time in my life I can wear pastels – well, I believe I can. Time for me to go through my wardrobe and do the colour testing.
Catherine B says:
I love seeing you in bright colours, Alyson. Having worn neutral colour for years when I stopped colouring my hair last year, a friend suggested I had my colours ‘done’ – great fun and did change my attitude to bright colours completely. I don’t stick rigidly to the ‘colour rules’ but my wardrobe has been transformed. The great thing about having had loads of greige-coloured clothes is that they are the perfect base for dyeing – no need for a complete refurb though, of course, I did buy some new pieces as well. At 70, I do think my skin tone has changed and colour does liven things up.
maudie says:
My hair is dark ‘bray’ – dark brown and grey which I actually like. My temple hair is fully grey and their is a generous sprinkling of silvery grey all the way through the rest of it. I had forgotten how dark my hair actually was as I had spent aeons dyeing it a very reddy/mahogany brown – consequently trawling around in autumnal colours. Now any form of brown clothing looks bloody awful -muddy and sludgy and makes me look old. For some reason navy does the same but I have discovered avocado-y green, mustard, charcoal grey and ‘dirty’ red which all seems to work. My favourite combination at the moment is charcoal grey and bright olive green (thank you unknown lady that I spied in the cafe at The Royal Academy that inspired this combo!). Lockdown with all it’s associated worries and boredom has given me time to experiment more with colour and clothing combinations in the knowledge that apart from my family no-one will see the inevitable clangers! I thought I was a ‘casual glamourpuss’ (well, sort of!) but have found that I am a mix of Gentlewoman/Scandanista – my husband is not that impressed but, well, whatever!!! To end, thank you for posting so regularly and keeping us all sane, I hope you and your family and remaining well.
Thanks, Maudie – that’s very kind of you to mention my family (all in different towns and cities across the world/ up north).
Andrea Russell says:
Interesting thing colour – I think it is an indicator of confidence in people. I feel many of us need to ‘feel in the mood’ for colour. I love colour and I have found it opens up your world – in a recent article in The Times (this week.. I forget what day) Anna Murphy talked about how people talk to you if you wear something colourful – even in a social distanced shopping line. I agree with this, a bright jumper or jacket attracts attention, it is an opportunity for someone to comment.
I assume that is why some people chose to stay in the grey… I like many 50+ women have a lot of grey and navy but the best days are the days I wear my pink trouser suit! I also try and put on a bright top for my many work video calls – it’s a better opening gambit than the dreaded obvious…
Once I had finally got the ‘nerve’ to wear it over Christmas my fuchsia pink velvet jacket is my wardrobe outlier!
I found that once I’d turned into a silver vixen, white wasn’t the easiest colour to wear near my face, so I’ve had to be selective. And I’ve also found, again, with the silver locks, where black is considered a no-no for sextagenarians, again, with careful selection, I can wear it better than I used to be able to. I used to shy away from red…it was very rare to find a red garment in my wardrobe, not because it didn’t/doesn’t suit me, but because it’s not a colour I looked to often. But I now have quite a selection of red tops/dresses…suddenly against grey/white, it looks a whole lot better. Even that mustard colour you’re wearing in the photos is one I’ve always avoided but wished I could wear (looks amazing on you), but now, I’m thinking, you know what? I think I can wear that now. And, like you, pale grey, even dark grey, doesn’t cut it anymore. I rather like your idea of holding your wrist up against the screen…why didn’t I think of that!!! I think also, with the change of hair colour, your skin tone changes…another joy of aging (gracefully, of course).
Great post – LOVE your writing Alyson. I’m 6 months into to the transition to my natural grey and like another reader Annie Green was into brown and whilst I still think it looks ok’ish I will follow her lead and try some tan. Will definitely set aside some time to do the colour test with my wardrobe. I’ve got a pale pink top in an online basket that I haven’t yet checked out- I’ve always had an aversion to this colour as when friends were having babies (a couple of decades ago admittedly!) many of them (especially those with daughters?) wore pale pink and as at the time I was struggling to come to terms with the fact that I would never become a mother myself and therefore was never going to wear pink in celebration of my baby girl, i avoided it. However, it feels fitting as I’m now safely in a land of peaceful acceptance of my childlessness (and my age 59) that wearing pink will feel good for many reasons. Also confirms to me that fashion isn’t frivolous. Clothes are a passion of mine, hugely important in my life and as you say Alyson, in the right colour they can spark joy!
Meg says:
A very timely post subject for me! I lost all my dyed blonde and highlighted hair after cancer treatment and now it’s growing back in what I have to assume is my natural color.. ( I forgot what that was, in all honesty) It is medium brown on the crown , generously sprinkled with silver but the sides are pure silver. I am loving it . I look forward to not coloring it! But I did wonder about my most flattering colors now that I have a G I Jane brush- cut of hair. I have been playing in my closet since I can’t get to the shops. And I have to say that my best colors are still what they were before- soft cool tones. Not to say I don’t like an occasional black ensemble, or some very happy brights, but the soft cool colors are still what make me smile when I see myself in the mirror. Today is a pink cardigan and white denims.
I can’t wait to have it long enough to brush up and allow that pure silver to take center stage. Thank you so much for your thoughtful post.frances wray says:
As I got older my hair thinned considerably and went a dismal patchy gray, so that even with good styling it was impossible to imbue with any sort of elegance. On my 60th birthday I decided “enough” and bleached it up to platinum and cropped to 1/2″; the bleach coarsened the hair shafts and made it look thicker, and any slightly sparse areas I evened out with Topix. I never would have done anything so drastic if I had not had significant hair challenges, but I am happy with the result (& refuse to feel guilty, even though aging naturally was my aspiration). On a different note I love everything about your blog other than the title, as to me “That’s not my age” suggests one would rather be a different age………….. I think mature women can “Come of age” in the fullest sense, as we have the confidence and wisdom to be ourselves, which is the foundation of true beauty. I do appreciate your active challenge to societies ageist attitudes which I believe will crumble in our lifetime.
Hello Frances, thank you for commenting; agree with you about confidence and wisdom and ageist attitudes – and your new hair sounds fantastic. That’s Not My Age does have a double-meaning but it’s supposed to be tongue in cheek and positive – in a ‘what’s age got to do with it?’ or ‘it’s not about my age’ kind of way.
Sorry, missed the dry humor in the title, been in the USA for several decades, and lost the nuance. I do love my hair cropped, though I rather fear that one day I will end up with a head of Topix clinging desperately to one last hair, but we will cross that bridge when we come to it. I liked your jumpsuits on the later blog, I had one on the last in fashion round; I seem to recall they were the most comfortable garment on the planet. You should charge a fee, all the twenty year old bloggers make no apologies for needing an income, though like many others I would find your special events inaccessible due to distance. Have you come across a blog called Jet Set Sewing? I found it via a pattern review site, and thought it was fun, highly personal, and very well informed, a kindred spirit perhaps…….
I’ve always worn soft colors ( grey, beige, petal pink), but I’ve been attracted to brighter colors (in bits) lately. I know nothing about what colors suit me (never figured that out!); I always just chose what colors I liked, in general. (People tell me I should wear red, but it’s my least favorite color!) Still, I’d like to make better choices, so I’ll finally delve into that! (Can you recommend a good resource, Alyson?)
Leave a Reply
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
Hello Alyson. Great to see these portraits by Claire back on view at TNMA. I always liked you in the yellow, sunflower yellow in my terminology, Mac and when you got your award in a blouse of similar hue. I’m wearing this colour more and more for last couple of years. I have a Max Mara coat of similar shade, discount Bicester village good buy, and have started to wear again and cotton and linen tops too. I like the effect on morale and on the complexion from these brights. The same for orange and red which I’ve always worn as tops, dresses, handbags and shoes. All of the citrus shades I have on hand so I’m pulling them out to wear.
Thanks for this cheering post.