When is a bargain not a bargain?
Lingerie photo: lonelylabel.com
As an eighteen year old fashion student, I once bought two pairs of silk cami-knickers in the Fenwick January sale. One pair were black satin, the other raspberry pink edged with cream lace. (Madonna was big at the time) Heavily discounted, I was chuffed at bagging a bargain but the lingerie would languish in tissue paper in my bottom drawer, unworn for over two decades. Eventually, I ‘grew’ into them – not physically – but in terms of confidence and maturity. Unknowingly, I’d made the classic faux pas of buying for an ‘ideal’ self rather than my actual self.
These days when confronted with a reduced tag screaming BUY ME! I coolly ask myself some questions. Can I wear this tomorrow? Does it fit? Does it work with my existing wardrobe? And crucially, Is this for the real me or an idealised me? Whatever the price tag, a bargain is only a bargain if you wear the damned thing. Any garment that remains on its hanger is not a bargain. It’s a fantasy, folly, mistake or waste of money.
After Christmas spending, the lure of big savings would traditionally tempt shoppers back out to splurge more in the Boxing Day or January sales. But this year, the global pandemic will put pay to the nauseating scrum scenes we’ve become accustomed to seeing on TV. Anyway, discounts are no longer a seasonal offer but a ubiquitous and perennial one – and this year we’re likely to see more online reductions with retailers trying to make up for Covid- related losses.
Discount stores, factory shops or bargain ‘villages’ such as Bicester or Cheshire Oakes mean reductions aplenty. According to Bethan Alexander, Course Leader of MA Global Fashion Retailing at the London College of Fashion, UAL, “of the 150 billion dollars of new clothing bought annually, one quarter of new clothing items are never worn. This perpetual 40% off culture, is like a discounting drug that really hooks people in. Black Friday has now extended into Cyber Monday and so it goes on.”
Alexander admits she tends to stay away from sales nowadays. “Many people become victims of the psychological pressure to buy things they don’t need. Maybe it’s an age thing but I would rather spend any disposable income on my kids and experiences. That’s where I get my emotional fix.” There is a form of liberation in stepping away from fashion’s consumer conveyor belt and there’s also the whole sustainability argument about buying less, which is better for the planet because it means less landfill.
If the sales are a regular treat, there are a few ground rules. Have a budget, have a plan and have a strategy. In the same way, you should eat before visiting the supermarket, before frittering your cash on yet more on more items for your closet, do a serious stock take and familiarise yourself with what you already possess. Maybe 2021 is the perfect time to go cold turkey when it comes to discount shopping.
Nilgin Yusuf is a freelance writer. You can find her on Twitter @Nilgin and Instagram @nilgin_yusuf
Lingerie photo: Lonely
Discussion (33 Comments)
Your lingerie story reminded me of the way my husband used give me gifts of lingerie that were better suited to his fantasies than to the real me then wonder why I seldom wore them! Thankfully, he has learned. A woman needs to dress for her authentic self.
Lesley Somerville says:
I think you should take that as a huge compliment! But seriously, what is it with men and their fantasies? It puts such pressure on women to ‘perform’, whilst at the same time keeping up with all the mundane and very un-sexy household stuff. It will only change when we push back and demand change. Meanwhile I’m happily man-less and find life far less stressful as a result.
Rach with an E says:
I bought a few new pieces on line last year, anticipating a return to ‘normal’. Ha. They weren’t in the sales but were things I’d normally wear so I am going to try my absolute best to shop my wardrobe instead. And to stop the idle browsing of websites but to pick up a book instead.
So far, so good (Day 5!)Good shout Rach with an E re: focused reading rather than unnecessary spending…Keep it up!
Catbird Farm says:
What helped me was to unsubscribe from all marketing emails – no exceptions.. Those “40% off!” announcements were just so tempting and distracting and I could never resist just a “quick look” that inevitably ended in a purchase.
Opting out of all marketing has shown me the power of “out of sight, out of mind.”
Lisa Harvey says:
“Do I want to wear it now?” Is the question I was advised to ask myself. Saves me from buying things that will fit when I’ve lost some weight, changed my style etc.
Anna K. says:
When I lived near the capital (I’m now in the sticks, 20 miles from the nearest Tesco’s) I did my sales recce months before on ‘quiet’ shopping days, with time to make a considered assessment. I tried on coveted, top quality items way beyond my budget then waited to see if they were reduced in the sale. If so, I could collect and pay, no queueing for fitting rooms. No reduction? I had the money to spend another day. I still have, and wear, some of the bargains I bought 20-30 years ago.
Heather Jenkinson says:
“Will I ever wear it?” is where so many of us go wrong, because we’re speaking to our idealised self and not the one who is actually paying for it . Your line of questioning is far more practical (and honest): “ Can I wear this tomorrow? Does it fit? Does it work with my existing wardrobe? And crucially, Is this for the real me or an idealised me?“ Really helpful shift. Thank you.
Jo says:
Totally agree Heather, the idealised me has cost me a fortune but made rich pickings for the charity shops in both purchases and donations so maybe a silver lining for others LOL.
Gillian Bingham says:
I bought very little last year. A jumper in an actual shop, which I’ve worn once but definitely will wear, a half price dress (online) which I wore to stay at home on Christmas Day, a half price jumpsuit bought months ago online and never worn and a couple of tops in an online sale. I was pleased with all the items but could have easily done without them although online shopping provided a bit of much needed excitement and anticipation! I agree that it’s too easy to be tempted to buy “bargains” online. Good advice about the questions we should ask ourselves before buying….
Sara says:
Absolutely! Great article, great comments. I have begun the new year by unsubscribing to various shopping sites, working on the basis that I know well enough where to shop when I need something, and browsing can lead so, so easily to unnecessary purchases. I try to use sales for expensive items well discounted that I need; two fab bargains in 2020 yet to be worn: a perfect long length black jacket of great cut and quality at 60% reduction and fab perfect white sneakers (Russell &Bromley, usually out of my price range) at 70% off. Just waiting to be vaccinated and………….. might life begin again? We can but hope, and I still do.
Love the lingerie tale, who amongst us hasn’t got a similar story?kolalaO says:
Ines de la Fressange sums it up as : if you cannot wear it today, as you are, leave it. If you need to loose 2 pounds, change your hair etc… leave it… Wise.
Liz says:
I feel this was written for me. I am still waiting for the ideal me to arrive and wear all the clothes in my wardrobe. Real me wears 5% of my clothes. Possibly not that much……it’s very hard to give up the dream., though.
@Joan'sGate says:
Most of my wardrobe is worn consistently, about 10% of the time. I quit buying clothing so much, and focus on what makes me happy..keeps me out of zero debt! I will let you know that I just turned 71 years old in December 2020…Takes that long to know what truly makes you happy.
Vivien Minto says:
So agree. I have taken up knitting… it keeps my hands busy and away from the internet on long winter evenings. And, who knows, I might even manage to make something wearable!
Harriet Forde says:
Such a good article……I return so many clothes as the woman I thought they worked on in the fitting room just doesn’t seem to be around when I put them on again at home. Its something about a retail experience (when we are able) that deludes me into thinking I am living a different life! That probably says the industry is doing its job well in selling to me.
The pandemic has shown me how to use what I have, at least some of the time…….the rest of it is in Lycra not looking much like Jane Fonda!
I can so relate to the Not Quite Jane Fonda Lycra scenario! A lot of retail is about buying into fantasies; it’s what keeps the wheels turning but once you’re aware of this, you’re less likely to be prey to it..
A much needed nudge in the right direction, I was just on the toast web site looking at summer dresses in the sale!
I have at least 4 similar in my wardrobe.
Great post !Tatjana Bourgeois says:
What a wonderful discourse. I recently commented to a friend that for me and I am sure others, the word SALE can be a slippery slope.
As a retiree, it has some taken some time to integrate my new lifestyle with my former focus on a professional wardrobe. I still found gravitating to lovely silks and such to wear them…..to the grocery store?
It took some time but the word “sale” has been replaced by the word “function”. I now have a small wardrobe with more consciously selected pieces.
I, too, feel that my spending will be on experiences rather than things. In 2019, I traveled to Slovenia to visit my elderly aunt. Six months later, she passed away. This trip was priceless!What a wonderful story! I really feel that a closet shouldn’t be like a Tardis but finite. It is possible to have enough clothes..
Martyna Coffey says:
What really resonated with me in this article is buying for the real self as opposed to the idealistic self. As if my life revolves around a fancy hectic social life.
I wish I had listened to myself more often in the past when this cropped up and I would have saved myself a fortune. Then again I have some beautiful items that I can loan to anyone and everyone and that give me a laugh when I think of their story.The lure of a discount is always tempting. I’ve learnt the hard way, Martyna so am
pleased the post resonated with you – it’s great you’re willing to loan your wardrobe out too.
Liz says:
I had only a vague awareness of this pitfall; nice to see it put into words. As my body has aged, shifted, changed, and my wardrobe needs also shifted as workspaces became more casual and the rules kept fading before my eyes like so many mirages, there is a “home base” I can keep returning to, as a starting point, of is this right for me?
Longdenlife says:
Apart from things like t-shirts I always like to try on clothes before I buy them (sale or no sale) as I am in between sizes so I really cant tell what is going to fit me or not (added to the fact that shops have very random sizing!). I have found that during the current COVID situation, being unable to try on clothes before I buy them has really curbed my purchasing. I am also a very visual and tactile shopper, I like to see things in real life and feel the material etc. I have previously tried things on in real life, waited for the sales then purchased the right size and colour online, but overall online shopping holds nothing but frustration for me. I couldn’t think of anything worse than purchasing 5 or 6 (or more) items, waiting for them to be delivered, try on, pack up the returns and getting them sent straight back.
However, I did buy some more work trousers online over Christmas (husband tumble dried my favourite pair and they are now size 4 pedal pushers!) – I knew the style and size I wanted so online wasn’t an issue. However, now we are currently in lockdown and I usually work in a school, they wont be worn for a while!
Susanna says:
I’m trying to move in this direction – I have some notable “ideal me” purchases hanging accusingly in my wardrobe. A closely related problem, for me, is adapting to being retired in the middle of the pandemic. Normally I would be “shopping my wardrobe” for new combinations, and mixing my former work clothes with casual pieces to see what will work (beautiful formal navy blazer, I’m looking at you, wondering about a jeans pairing). It’s much harder to do that when I am so seldom out in public, but my husband is appreciating the attempts I am making in the shelter of home! I really value Alyson’s articles along these lines, especially the pictures.
Jo says:
Brilliant piece, thank you. I love clothes so much but have been gradually reducing the pieces I buy. Because I’m a nerd, I’ve tracked my clothes buying over the past three years – 72 items in 2018 (I mean…who needs that many clothes?!?), 42 in 2019 and 31 last year. This year my upper limit I’ve set for myself is 26. Weirdly, over the three years the amount I’ve spent has stayed roughly the same – I’m finally finally buying less but buying better! I sold a lot on eBay this summer and have reached a point of having a great wardrobe that makes sense. I will always love clothes and finding the perfect dress – I don’t want to stop shopping, just wasting money on piles of stuff that have no purpose.
I have bins of never worn clothes gathering dust as I wait for ideal sized me to materialize. I think it’s time to pack them off to charity and employ your wonderful questions going forward. My favorite: can I wear this tomorrow?! Well done!
Mrs Tonia says:
I’m a careful shopper who keeps my clothes for a long time and wears favourites regularly. That said, I do like to add a few new pieces to my wardrobe from time to time. Following ” more dash than cash ” approach to what I wear I have always tried to buy things in sale time when marked down considerably. And used to patronise discount shopping villages such as Bicester Village, or the one outside York, quite frequently to get things for myself and male family members.
Many of the nicer things I own I waited to buy in sales having waited until prices reduced.
Yes, we all need less consumption and to use what we own in every category fully, to mend and repair and repurpose items of clothing. I plan to do that this year as last. I’m working my way through a pile of darning a piece a day to extend the life of knitwear, but may buy reduced items occasionally too. I’m sitting here writing this in a cheerful looking warm sunflower yellow jumper which I’d had my eye on and finally bought well -reduced in price at Jigsaw last winter.
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I totally agree. After reading a number of articles about the fast fashion industry, I have decided to spend my dollars on quality clothing rather than a quantity of clothing. I also want to spend my extra dollars on traveling, either with my family or friends.