When life feels like a disaster movie… (and you’re experiencing Fear Of Going Out)
Photo: Pexels
Why do so many disaster movies start with or involve crowd scenes? Jaws (1975) is the obvious example but there’s also Rollercoaster (1977) Deep Impact (1998) and Earthquake (2016). All include scenes of mass hysteria, the source which might be respectively, a killer shark, fairground ride, earthbound meteor or erupting mountain.
I hadn’t made this link before between crowds and danger until a recent day trip to Central London. The sun shone and I considered how lucky I was to be able to meet an old friend for lunch and a matinee. It was just like the old days…or was it? I noted my levels of tension increased when confronted by the sea of bodies. Hordes of unmasked people teemed across pavements, alfresco lunchers were packed like sardines and the theatre was rammed. That’s when, I remembered Jaws. I could almost hear the soundtrack.
Original Jaws poster photo: 1st Dibs
After two years of laying low, maintaining distance and playing safe, ‘business as usual’ feels disquieting and a bit scary. But according to numerous accounts, this kind of post-pandemic, situational anxiety is not uncommon and recent research suggests up to 72% of adults now struggle with FOGO or Fear Of Going Out.
Many vulnerable individuals are still unable to enjoy such freedoms. There are those who continue to shield for their own protection or for the safety of others, carers for instance or those with auto immune conditions. For them, free and easy is a long way off and the idea of being released into packed throngs represents not only a psychological fear but a genuine threat.
Despite restaurants, clubs, cinemas and shops all being back in pre-pandemic swing, Covid is still much with us and remains a worry for many. For those who find this nervousness is constant and debilitating, psychologists are offering up new labels such as Coronophobia and COVID Anxiety Syndrome. But even if the Covid-related angst isn’t persistent, the idea we should all be able to return to normal as though the last two years didn’t happen, is unrealistic.
This stress related to re-entering normal life is experienced on a spectrum and spans mild unease to distressing meltdowns. Sharon Vickers, a London-based artist experienced a full-blown anxiety attack when she ventured into Soho to meet her daughter, ‘I was overwhelmed by the crowds, the sheer volume of people, colours, movement, smells. I had to get out and sat in a churchyard until she found me.’
While some are phlegmatic about relaunching themselves into life’s mosh pit, others have a sense of foreboding. Two years of Covid-19 lockdowns have affected how many feel about being in public. As hospital admissions continue to spiral, this suggests a prudent approach is wise, despite the nationwide vaccination programme. For those who feel that FOMO is getting the better of them, there are some helpful suggestions here which include taking things slowly and being ‘sure enough’, acknowledging one’s fears and visualising a joyful social life.
The mantra Be Safe is as important as ever.
Nilgin Yusuf is a freelance writer. You can find her on Twitter @Nilgin and Instagram @nilgin_yusuf
Discussion (17 Comments)
Stephanie says:
I can identify with a sense of unease in crowded places. I do not like being among too many people and the movement and the noise I do find overwhelming. I recently went to spend a long weekend in Dorset and the sense of comfort and normality it brought -Dorset is never exactly teeming at the times of year we go in Spring and Autumn – was such a relief. But I am a Londoner born and bred and could never leave it entirely. There is an odd sense of waiting still, but for what I’m not sure
Maria says:
Good article. Governments have chosen to obfuscate, act irresponsibly, and place corporate and economic wishes above public health so people are in fact on their own. By choosing to ignore health experts and put commerce over health many countries are making a difficult time much more difficult for so many many people. Thanks for your thoughtful reflection and helpful words.
Yvonne says:
Maria, I agree with you. Cases are on the rise here and all restrictions have been lifted. I find that so irresponsible and as you said we’re on our own. Very anxiety-producing. Glad that you dare speak up about this issue.
Nicola says:
Well said Maria. In my case a lot of anxiety comes from not knowing what really is safe and not trusting the Government to have our best interests at heart. I’m still being very cautious and will do for some time I suspect.
Annie says:
But surely this nervousness is not unfounded? Currently, the modelling conducted by Tim Spector’s Zoe project estimates that around 1 in 13 people have the virus. The Office for National Statistics admits that its stats are underestimating prevalence since the withdrawal of free testing, but also estimates a similar figure for current infections. Deaths from Covid hover around the 2,000 a week mark and the possibility of Long Covid is still very much a reality with the current strain. On top of that, my booster was over 6 months ago and there’s no possibility of getting another, even though rates are rising fastest amongst seniors. So, yes, I do have FOGO, but with good reason!
Annie, I have FOGO, too. Now, I don’t feel so alone Thanks for your comment and I am so grateful for this post.
Gretta says:
Excellent and thoughtful article, so pleased I am not alone in finding it difficult to make rational and balanced decisions about where it is worth taking risks. I have just recovered from covid and wonder if my feelings of anxiety in Central London, cinemas, theatres and public transport etc will diminish as a result.
Joan says:
Don’t forget to wear comfortable shoes when going out for a museum visit which I failed to do yesterday when I wore a new pair of ankle boots to see the Van Gogh exhibit at the Santa Barbara Museum of Art.
The galleries were crowded and most of the viewers were not wearing a mask, but I wore mine.Being fully vaxed and boostered I still think I got Omicron in January after attending an event at an airport hangar museum nearby. The only symptom was feeling very fatigued and having a stuffy head, but I did remain at home, and wore my double mask when I had to get grub out of concern for others.
Goddessinthedetails says:
I’m terrified of going out because I’ve just been diagnosed with breast cancer. On the one hand, it’s important for your morale to go out and about. On the other, you are terrified of picking up Covid and that impacting on the speed of your treatment (on top of delays caused by the Covid backlog). I went to an art exhibition today but I failed to enjoy it because of the jostling of the unmasked.
However, I noticed in the waiting room at the breast clinic this week that the women waiting were often wearing colour – a red jacket, a pink and blue scarf – and there was one 90-something in Chanel sunglasses. I thought these counted as small acts of defiance and life affirmation through fashion choice.Dear Goddess, I’m sorry to hear about your diagnosis and hope your treatment goes as well as it possibly can do without any Covid delays. Stay stylish and defiant. All the best, Alyson
MaureenC says:
Interesting piece and discussion, thank you Nilgin. With a partner who is in the most vulnerable group the last two years have been lived with severe restrictions. Our whole family have lived with the fear of being ‘ the one ‘ who gives him Covid and having to live with that after its potentially fatal consequences. Whilst that has eased up in recent months with reduced severity of omicron and the advent of anti virals the anxiety is still there. I’ve been trying to be out and about a bit more then I had a covid scare after a trip to the hairdresser (he texted the following day to say he’d had a positive test) and the worry was that if I’d caught it that would prevent my partner’s long awaited hospital tests. I feel a deep resentment for the carelessly unvaccinated and the people telling me endlessly that we just have to live with it. Generally those people have experienced zero consequences and little restriction on their lives and are typified by the shower in Downing St receiving their long overdue fixed penalties.
Angela says:
So good to read I am not the only one feeling this way. I am in Australia and masks are no longer mandatory but I am still wearing mine whenever I venture out. Never going too far or anywhere too crowded as this feeling of unease, that I am trying to over come, makes me very uncomfortable. I recently went to a large shopping mall at what I thought would be a quiet time, my own aversion therapy, but the jostling crowds and majority of unmasked left me on the brink of a panic attack so I quickly returned to my car and sat until I felt calm enough to drive home.
I absolutely agree with Stephanie about the odd sense of waiting, just a bit longer …….
Thank you for the postMrs Tonia says:
It is valuable to read and consider these perspectives and experiences. I know a friend recovering from cancer treatment and other health problems is very anxious to not become infected. The laissez faire approach of “Living with Covid” policies is very challenging. Being old and triple jabbed thus far I’ve managed to avoid Covid though my grown up sons and partners and many others I know have had it in past waves.
We go forward with caution still wearing masks and trying to socialise outside or in well-ventilated spaces. And all the while hoping for the best.Karen Ross says:
I am grateful for your thoughtful writing. It made me think, am I being prudent enough? I live in Aotearoa New Zealand and to a large extent we have been removed from the pressures people have experienced overseas.
Whilst we have had restrictions, I am currently experiencing exhilration at being able to book tickets for music, ballet and theatre again. I do however maintain my mask wearing,
Patrish 
Leave a Reply
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
Thanks Nilgin for these thoughtful comments. It’s tricky balancing one’s own risks now. In this time of “nudge and fudge” to make sensible choices one needs to prioritise depending on health status. What do you really miss doing ? How safe do you feel doing these activities? I have been going to see live art in galleries as soon as their doors opened. Everything needed pre-booking and mask wearing. Fair enough I went to many exhibitions and greatly enjoyed doing so. Alyson and I met to see Lubaina Himid at Tate Modern for example. I used to love going to the cinema and have scarcely gone. The two occasions to see matinees in scarcely populated cinemas. Again I really enjoyed seeing West Side Story and Parallel Mothers. I wore a mask and felt confident. Taking long distance train journeys and going on the Tube has been a bit more problematic. But was a means to an end. So I booked and went on trains clad in a mask. And social distanced. I gave up going to a gym or indoor exercise facility but swim in an outside lido and recently in an indoor studio for Pilates classes. How wonderful to do a real class after months and years now of zoom yoga classes. Those remain alongside real classes. Soon I shall go to my first live music event. And recommence travel to meet close contacts elsewhere. Caution is needed but I think one has to move out into the world and hope for the best and be grateful for the opportunities to do so.