A note on age-appropriate style
— by Alyson Walsh
This week, I was asked what I thought of the label ‘age appropriate.’ Obviously, I said this kind of tired terminology (age-appropriate, anti-ageing) is redundant today. Age-appropriate is inappropriate. We need to talk about ageing in a more positive way. So, when I picked up the Guardian this morning and read the How I get ready column featuring novelist Kathy Lette, it really made me laugh:
‘Style fascists are always telling women my age to dress in beige and not show any flesh. But why should we stop wearing minis and Wonderbras? I refuse to give up my pink leopard-skin miniskirts – although it did hurt when my teenage daughter pointed disapprovingly at me in one and said, “You are NOT going out dressed like that.”‘
Discussion (21 Comments)
- dottoressa says:
I agree with you,it is inappropriate and politically incorrect. Why are there so many critics and haters,why anyone thinks that he/she is an expert fashion policeman ( and this kind of shows I don’t like at all)? You are always giving positive examples and advices,so if I (or someone else)get it wrong,it’s my problem,not something to laugh at ( my english is,so here I don’t mind laughing at all :-))
And there are so many different opinions what is good style………..
Have a nice weekend
Dottoressa - Nicolene Richards says:
Style has no age restriction, and the concept of age appropriate is highly inappropriate! We have more confidence, we spend more money and time on beauty treatments, we are more mindful of what we eat and how we preserve our bodies keeping it toxin free , and in good shape, more that any youngster ever will, and we are more concerned about looking respectable and not dressing up as freaks with belly buttons in your face and bum cleavage and underwear exposed. We are no longer slaving ourselves to trends and we wear what we like, not what we are told to or because of pear pressure. That, is owning style. Turning heads has never done anybody any harm, so keep it up girls, we are going to shake them up and make the world realise that we own it, while the youth is still working for it…. Great blog and great post!!
FF - Lorna McCollum says:
I’m flabbergasted that we still have these comments on age related style…. Why??? If you look after yourself and have style, wear it. I am sick and tired of everyone having an opinion on increasing age and what we should all be doing. How dare they!! Also , and pay heed, by the looks if some that dish out this age related style, I doubt if I’d be taking it!! Anyway.. I would have thought with the rate of obesity in young people they will soon leave us alone… All the oldies will be left in peace.. Why??? Simply because there are so many fat birds wearing mini skirts!
- amy says:
Thank you for sharing this. I am so tired of the phrase ‘age appropriate’. It is so offensive to me. It needs to go away and die. Are you aware of the #IwillwearwhatIlike movement on Instagram? A group of women like myself are really making a social media statement of how they feel about being told ‘what not to wear’ because of their age, by wearing those items, photographing themselves in those items, and then posting them on social media with the hashtag.
- Zanna says:
It’s easy to look cool and chic in black, but my praise is all for the woman in pink . I avoid pink like the bubonic plague and here is someone looking wonderful in yards of it . It all looks very expensive especially the shoes [which I’d wear any day] and IMO there are times when that fact shines through.
- Sharemychic says:
Being concerned about these silly labels is a great way to squash your personal style. I say, wear what makes you feel good about yourself and screw the appropriate style police!
- Val S says:
I don’t suppose they mentioned anything about what men wear. Of course not.
- Janet says:
OMG, this whole “age appropriate” thing drives me mad. Appropriate for *whom*?? I’m in my mid-60s, am blessed with excellent health & genetics, work like a dog to keep my figure reasonably trim (and to maintain that good health). I wear my jeans tight, my heels high, my nails painted (purple today), my hair long(ish) & yes, I colour it. I wear makeup, lots of jewelery (earrings, rings, pendants), swear like a %&!@ing longshoreman, got my first tattoo 2 years ago & am getting another next week for my birthday. I don’t wear mini-skirts any more (more for comfort than “appropriateness”), nor do I wear what women 40 years my junior are wearing because while I might not give a hoot about being “appropriate”, neither am I a complete idiot. I still ride the back of my best friend’s Harley, I still have sex as often as possible (not as rare as one might think at my age, thank God) & when I look back at my life, the only things I can truthfully say I regret are the things I *didn’t* do, not the things I did. So my reply to those who suggest I be more “age appropriate” is both succinct and unprintable. And what I love most? The fact I am FAR from alone.
- GSL says:
All 3 of these ladies look fab here… but I’ll bet Ms Lette’s teenage daughter is wise beyond her years.
- jacqueline says:
I mostly agree with the post, and hate the style fascists…But please, tell me, what’s wrong with beige? It’s a fascist attitude . I’m 61, and I wear my hair long, wear jeans and all the things I think that look good on me. Not mini skirts though, But I love beige, has wear all shades of it since I was a 14, as a love black, and white,and gray, and all colours of the rainbow. Why demonise beige, like some lady who stated that “beige is death” and wears red from head to toe? Good for her, but I assure you, there is nothing wrong with beige, it can be very stilish, interesting and classy.
- Janet says:
Jacqueline, I am SO guilty of this — and after reading your post (wincing a little as I did), I realize I owe you and my mother & a million other women an apology. I don’t wear beige because it doesn’t suit my colouring (these days I wear mainly white &/or black) & have been heard to say “my mother thought beige was a colour” while decrying “builder’s beige” as the default for most rental apartments. But you’re right. I know people (and my mother was one of them!) who look fabulous in beige or camel or any variation thereof. Strange how I can get so upset over the phrase “age appropriate” or “Gran Glam” [just saw that in a local newspaper & you’d better believe I shot off an irate letter to the editor], but can be so careless in my own off-hand put downs of someone e’se’s style choices. Proof you’re never too old to be taught a thing or two!
- TNMA says:
Thank you for all your fantastic comments – and very well said, Nicolene.
Yes, I have seen that hashtag, Amy, I need to check it out properly.
Janet – you sound fantastic! And Jacqueline, I know what you mean about beige – I actually like some shades of camel and coffee colours and think they can look very flattering. Sue Kreitzman is the artist who says, ‘Beige will kill you.’ I’ve spoken to her about that!GSL – ssshhhh!
- Tove says:
I had quite a moment the other day. At the airport a lady, unknown to me, came up saying: “Just had to tell you you look fab!”
She was appr 45, I am 67. Needless to say she made my day. - jacqueline says:
Thank you Janet and Allyson for your comments! Yes, I remember the artist and I think she looks fabulous in bright colours! But I insist, as Janet’s mother, that beige (and camel and greige and cream and all its shades) is a colour that deserves its place in style. We can be FAB in beige and in ALL colours (or non-colours, if you want)!
- Jane Dalea-Kahn says:
Another way to tyrannize women. But as much as I’d like to join in with the mob here, and say it doesn’t matter, you must admit, there is SOME TRUTH to it. After all, you don’t want to be like the dreaded saying “Mutton dressed as lamb”. Gulp. Here are my rules: less is more. If you’re going to wear something ‘non age appropriate’ wear the one piece, but tone the rest of your outfit down a few notches. Carefully check the fit of the item – nothing worse than too tight in the wrong places. Don’t shop in the Junior department for your non-age appropriate items – those clothes are cut for the 15 year old body, not ours. I’m non- age appropriate in many ways – I’m 56, have long hair and ride a Harley. As I write this I have a sparkly “party nail” on the 4th finger of both my hands (short nails, light pink polish with silver ‘party nail). XO
- Janet says:
Yes! Jane, are you my long-lost sister? Toenails, too, right? Purple polish with little silver stars to match your favorite sandals? (Oh, wait — that’s me.) LOL! Let’s all lift a glass to being as age INappropriate as we can be within the parameters of good sense & good taste! I think it’s falling on the shoulders of this generation of women to poke as many holes in society’s out-dated & ridiculous expectations & presumptions of “age” as we can. As I told my (real) sister a couple of weeks ago: I swear if one more perky 20-something calls me “dear”, I’m taking her down, hard.
- Shelley says:
I am the proud 65 year old daughter of a beautiful , eccentric woman. My Mom is, and always was, gorgeous. She has white hair adorned with a purple streak in the front., 3 earrings in one ear, 4 in the other and a nose stud. She loves jewellery and leaves no appendage unadorned . She does not leave the house without her makeup . She wears a lot of purple and its friends, mauve and lavender , because she loves the colour. She dances several times a week plays cards and is learning to play bridge , volunteers at hospital , is on the board of directors of several places. She loves life, has wonderful friends, including many much younger than herself since most folks her age can’t keep up with her. Yes, she’s a little ” out there” . She is always true to herself, she always tries to do her best , she is memorable in good ways . This is how I want to age. Appropriately for me.
- chris says:
Darlings, we all know the best accessory is a good and healthy body no matter one’s age 🙂 Bravo to all you ladies staying true to yourselves while being your best and healthy selves.
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Ms Lette dresses to suit her personality and shape and I think she always looks great. They all do because they dress to suit themselves.