Older women on their personal style
— by Alyson Walsh
From writing as a freelance journalist to blogging as That’s Not My Age, I’m often asked for my thoughts on style and age, what we wear and how it makes us feel. The latest feature on this issue is for Refinery 29, ‘ 7 Older Women on their Personal Style.’ Where I underlined a point on personal style and age that I always come back to, ‘One thing has become abundantly clear: the common wisdom on what is appropriate to do, say and wear over-40 is no longer relevant. Having rocked out to the Rolling Stones and pogo-ed to the Sex Pistols, baby boomers are never going to be told what we can and cannot do. We’ve grown up breaking and remaking the rules – gone are the days when hitting 50, 60, 70 or beyond meant conforming to a ubiquitous look. Looking good rather than looking young is the new mantra. It’s not about age, it’s about style.’
Here’s a link to the Refinery 29 feature, I’m pleased to be included with six other women of style and substance.
Discussion (27 Comments)
- Mrs Tonia says:
Another super atmospheric portrait of you Alyson. Really like your coat and ecru and black striped scarf. Something I’d wear happily. I read the article and liked the tone and photographs and comments of all the women featured. All including you sounded confident in their clothing choices and style. Exactly the message you advocate in Know your Style. Jasmin F really caught my eye, a very good looking and relaxed looking woman wearing the new old big trainers, Nike maybe I’ve spotted in the window display in Office or similar.
Many good points to take away from this post. Wear what you like and find suits you with a high low mix but to look casual and modern make it more sporty with jeans and trainers in the mix. Have a good weekend. - Prima Darling says:
Hi Alyson, I loved the Refinery 29 feature, you’re in great company and my Instagram feed just increased by 6. This conversation is an important one but I must admit I still cringe when women over 40 with great style are referred to as older women of style. Why can’t they just be women with great style without reference to age? Style is ageless and you either have it or you don’t, so why after a certain age is it a surprise or an achievement to have style when you and the women in the piece have had great style all their lives. My hope is the age conversation will go the way that sexual orientation and gender discussions have gone; it shouldn’t matter. For now conversations like this are helpful and necessary to get us to the next place. Don’t think I’m on a high horse here, I’m not above posting blogs about women of style over forty, they’re some of my most popular posts, but the end game, I hope, will be age doesn’t matter. Until then, to you and all the stylish women out there, keep rocking it! Jolain
- Samantha says:
I completely agree…and I was thinking, what exactly is “older” anyway? Older than what? Are you older when you’re 30, 40, 50, etc….who gets to say what “older” is?
- Mrs Tonia says:
Hello Jolain and other readers. My interpretation of the focus on age and style now is the so called novel idea that older women, usually those over 50 or menopausal age, still look both attractive and stylish and confident in their appearance. Not so long ago any of the 50 plus were supposed to have become invisible. And no longer worth a glance yet alone photograph in a magazine or online. I have one such book by a former Guardian journalism Helen who published a book The Invisible Woman. Prior to that she wrote a Guardian column, a precursor to Alyson and her blog, on how to dress stylishly as someone of this age. I read and contributed to this.
What we have now is counter ageism with grey haired slender models wearing the same clothes as the 20 or 30 something models in similar clothing. For example the All Ages column in the Guardian and recent Fashion issue of Grazia featuring Maye Musk. It’s a start and certainly an improvement but there is a long way to go. We have moved from deemed Invisible to out there and visible with grey hair and confident good looks. Those like Alyson of TNMA for example.- Prima Darling says:
Hi Mrs, Tonia, I totally agree that the conversation is going in the right direction and it’s a giant step forward from being invisible, but ageism with a side of misogyny is alive and well, particularly in the fashion and entertainment industries where women are too often judged primarily on their looks. I’ve never heard anyone refer to George Clooney as an older man with great style. But I don’t want to be a downer here, the women featured in the post are fabulous and are moving things forward!
- Alyson says:
I completely agree, Jolain and I too hope that we will reach a point where the age of a woman is irrelevant – or that when a brand uses a model over-50 in an ad campaign it’s not front page news but the norm. We see it in politics, too, where women are judged on their appearance and not on their ability.
- Alyson says:
Agree, Mrs Tonia, we are moving in the right direction but after 10 years of blogging as That’s Not My Age it still feels like we have a long way to go…. Have a good weekend.
- Anna says:
I think one of the problems (don’t get me wrong, I love the abundance of older models and role models) is, as you say, “grey haired slender models”. They look gorgeous….but not all of us are genetically endowed with slenderness or gorgeous looks. I would love more diversity among the older models. I still don’t see someone reflecting the majority of women. Of course models, by definition, have been chosen to be more attractive than the norm….but if we are to be true to the move to be more inclusive of older women, there are some of us who aren’t grey, who aren’t slim, who aren’t gorgeous, but are wanting to be stylish. And whose bodies have changed despite healthy eating and exercise…through genetics, medication, aging…
- Lisa says:
A billion congratulations and I love that outfit so so so much. Might persuade even me to wear leopard.
- Sarah Stubbs says:
Wonderful Alyson. Congratulations…. Looking stylish and fabulous as ever – great coat / scarf combination- love it all.
- Ann says:
Alyson, loved the article. And I adore your spots and stripes. So cool!
- Jodi Brown says:
Great article. I love Yasmin’s trainers. I live in jeans (501s), and have my own post-punk gentlewoman style. This is thanks to TNMA.
We are getting there slowly, and I don’t object to the ‘older woman’ tag. I just want to see more individual style out there for us, more visibility, less boring stuff marketed to us. - H K in Canada says:
I’ve been reading your posts for a couple of years now. I’ve wondered who takes all those fab shots for you… when you model a look?
(Maybe I missed this in a previous post?)And, have you ever done a piece on eyewear? Since about the age of 50 I’ve had to wear glasses during all my waking hours (bummer there). Whenever I need to get a new pair, I spend hours and hours before making a choice. I don’t have the budget for a wardrobe of eyewear sadly. You know. like Linda Rodin… many, many variations on those huge glasses.
- Jackie Clark Mancuso says:
Thank you Alison for reminding me to repeat the mantra “Personal Style” whene I get dressed. For me that means classic but adding something I’ve bought on a trip, or just unusual that makes it me. Yesterday, jeans and a tee made personal with an oversized cardigan, soft, distressed “pixie” boots (they’re old!), and a knitted olive scarf. I’ve even started a mini sketchbook with rough paintings of outfits to remember. My challenge is how to do dressy and keep it me.
- Claire B says:
I’m just thankful to be hitting 60 later this year at a time when it’s completely fine for me to be wearing more or less the same jeans and boots combo style I wore when I was 35 (with obvious updates), rather than looking forward to twinsets and sensible shoes etc. We’ve got a long way to go but thank goodness we’ve come as far as we have! And thank you to you Alyson and others like you for helping to break those old rules and keep us all inspired!
Right on!!!! You’re helping us all realize it isn’t age it’s style at every age. You’re doing a perfect example in your outfit today. But then again you always have an effortless style that is ageless!
PS. Where did you get that scarf???? Love it.- AnneM says:
Anna…..totally agree with you. While I have the silver hair, my body has never been slender! Have to say good, don’t want it to be. I know I’m going right against the grain here but slenderness is not a good look on older ladies. As we age what was slender in our youth quickly turns to scrawny with age; not always healthy!
- Sally says:
I was pleased at the range of color shown in all seven – though I wear it, mostly for pants, black seems to be everywhere. I LOVE color! And enjoy it as self-expression. Every morning includes thinking about the mood I’m in, what I’ll be doing, and I have to really convince myself to wear black – color is so gorgeous, also more of a challenge, simply more fun. I have to add, though, that I do dress with some sense of age (I’m 71) – and body (size 18) — so,. for instance, I don’t choose very short skirts or full, blousy looks because I look homely in them. I enjoy jewelry more than ever, though, especially as part of a total look. And echoing someone’s comment above, I feel as though I have more sense of style than ever, and feel happy with who I am.
- MxBristol says:
I LOVE your coat – where is it from? Loving the spots and stripes combo – my 2 favourite patterns!
- Michelle says:
I saw that Refinery article Alyson, Wow great feature lady!
It was nice to read such interesting quotes on personal style & see a couple of “new” faces in the list. I must admit, I’m a bit bored of the usual line up that seems to be cut & pasted between articles. In fact it’d be nice to do away with the whole age thing entirely. I personally don’t think about age when it comes to style, or behaviour. Why can’t a twenty year old take style inspiration, even admire a fifty year old like me?
I’m perplexed by other people’s surprise that a woman over a certain age could be stylish…or whatever, chic? When I started blogging I was told in no uncertain terms, by several experienced bloggers, to always tag my age. This is how you find your tribe they said. This is how women over 40 will notice you, they said…
Hmmm 3 years on it still doesn’t sit well to advertise my age as a draw card. Perhaps I should stop doing that? - Gill says:
One of the best photos of you Alyson. Love the green ring. I have one that I wear often and it’s surprising how something so small can lift an outfit.
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Congratulations and couldn’t agree more. I love your style because you have an effortless and casual look, that works best for me and has at every age. I never wore shouty clothes and won’t start now (as I’m older)